I know. I can’t believe it either. What a bloody sell out, right?
Not really, it was either this or poetry and no one likes reading poetry. Trust me, they don’t – I’m talking about the good stuff too, proper poetry, rhyming poetry.
I always thought that a poem without rhyme was just a story without pith..?
Good segue. If there is one form of poetry detested above the rest, it is Christmas Carols. Admittedly, there are people out there who love nothing more than a good hearty carolling; I just have yet to meet them. In fact most everyone I know, even those who claim to embrace everything about the festive season, despise Christmas Carols.
Certainly there is a time and a place for Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer to be hurtling through the Silent Night while Snoopy dreams of a White Christmas and yes, the place is probably wherever there is the mass of Christ – alas, the time is not the 21st century. These songs were written mid 1900s and at the time, they were massive…
Nowadays, not so much.
Nowadays the majority do what they can to avoid being subjected to these gay little jingles but here’s the thing, they’re bloody everywhere. Fortunately my chosen radio station administers an equal dosage of Christmas Carol as it does Justin Bieber, which is to say, less than zero milligrams; still, one cannot expect to drown out the audio of the outside world all day every day, one must enter public arenas at some time, and the instant one does…
Ah crap. Like I said, they’re bloody everywhere.
Believe it or don’t, this piece of writing was not intended – not primarily anyway – as disparagement towards Christmas Carols. It is supposed to be outlining, illustrating and celebrating the joy of family, the delight of gift giving, the awesomeness of Backyard Cricket, the freedom of cracking your first beer by 10am, the immeasurable happiness then later turgid regret of overeating; then doing the very same thing next mealtime.
That’s what it was supposed to be, because those things are important to me and I imagine, this is a sentiment embraced by most New Zealanders.
It is my belief that Christmas is a time when all grudges should be dropped, all ill feeling should be forgotten and any other shit between any other shitheads ought to be relinquished as well. It is no time for tension.
It’s Christmas and whether you perceive it in the Christian sense or otherwise, it’s a time for family.
Be there for yours.
Article by Mit Reklaw
Edited by Chris Mist
Photography by Honey Carr