Given its origins one might consider it ironic that the term ‘Avast’ is frequently spotted popping up in the corner of one’s eye like a brightly coloured buoy lost at sea.

Avast – an old nautical term meaning ‘stop’ or ‘cease’ – is also the name of the cost-free virus protection software I elected to use, once my beloved Microsoft Security Essentials had become obsolete a few years back.

What better idea could there be, I recall thought/mumbling, than to replace my supposedly outdated software with that of a word which is even more archaic than ‘halt’ or ‘cease’.

As I downloaded the software all those years ago, I remember running through my head the advice I’d been given regarding potential Security Software providers: “Avast’s good – if you don’t mind putting up with a million pop-ups a day…”

While the most I’ve counted in one day is twelve, a recent one I saw did make me chuckle.

Where ordinarily Avast’s pop-ups are simply advising ‘Security Definitions Have Been Updated’ or similar, and other than an encumbered cursor-click really require no effort on my part, of late they’ve become interesting…

I see I’ve referred to the downfall of Microsoft Security Essentials and subsequent rising of Avast! Free Antivirus (the exclamation point’s part of the name, not a typo) as being ‘all those years ago’ although seemingly, according to Avast I mean, it was actually 602 days ago, or at least that’s what the new pop-up offering me a ‘security upgrade’ maintains; mind you it has been maintaining that now for two weeks so, you know.

…This new and ‘interesting’ pop-up claims, given the ‘loyalty’ that I’ve shown Avast (602 days without paying a single cent) I am now entitled to their ‘enhanced protection’ but not only that, if I ‘Claim my Loyalty Reward now’, I’ll ‘SAVE 72%’.

In fairness I don’t know what level of protection I currently have but it seems adequate. Now though Avast are offering me superior protection with a saving of 72%; but 72% on what, I ask.

Oh, I see: it’s 72% less than the original fee Avast would have charged me, had I accepted their deal.

A better deal though, would surely be just to continuing not paying them.

Article by Tim Walker

Edited by Russ Tan Peace

Photography by Jonah Lomu