We push, we shuffle, we stress, we bustle, and all for what?

All to be at the front of the queue, that’s for what.

So, is that the queue of establishment, or is it the queue of fabrication; the queue of reality or the queue of perception – queue of life or of delusion?

As though fighting to be in the lead is so much more rewarding than simply taking a seat down the back, as though the salient position is somehow more favourable than the one at the tail end, as though struggling to be seen somehow holds more merit than simply relaxing and accepting that you might not be noticed, or worse, might not get there in front of others…?

There it is: we all want to be at the front so we can be the first to make it to the finish.

Huh. Sounds pointlessly convoluted; dangerously counterproductive.

It’s a fact though: hurrying gives people a sense of purpose, makes us feel busy; of course, the busier our brains feel, the more productive, the more successful we feel.

Therefore, we strive. We all want to be first, want to be at the front.

The way we drive is a fine example; positioned contentedly in the middle of a line of cars, as soon as the opportunity arises – perhaps a passing lane – suddenly everybody wants to be at the front. Even when time is of no concern to them, even when they really have nowhere to go, nowhere they especially need to be; even though the passing vehicle will then often sit just in front of, go no faster than, the car they’ve just passed, reaching the front affords the driver’s brain a sense of validation that makes it feel as though it is achieving, makes it feel it’s being productive and, as we all should know, a productive brain is a happy brain.

Ironically, try as we might, while most of us certainly aspire to lead the way and to be in front for as much of the journey as possible, seems like nobody actually wants to finish first. Despite efforts to be the first to make it there, the majority don’t want to finish at all; we always do what we can to push forward so we can be at the front, to lead the race for as long as we can, but when it comes time to cross that fabled finish-line, time to receive the glory of finally making it to the last post, pretty sure most of us would happily turn back.

We probably wish we could go back, start over, and take more time this time around; wish we hadn’t gone so fast when our pace wasn’t all that important.

We probably wish we hadn’t succumbed to the pressures of life, wish we hadn’t allowed ourselves, our lives, to become driven, become so firmly dictated, by the oppressive force of obligation.

We likely wish we had realised that all we needed to do, the only thing we ever really needed to achieve, was to take a moment, time to ourselves, to reflect, to understand, to appreciate that, although modern life might imply otherwise, it is not necessary to always be at the front.

It doesn’t matter if we are out of focus or even if we are never seen; regardless how far forward we are positioned, irrespective of how quickly, how impetuously, how insanely forcefully we launch ourselves into it, life will always just continue to meander along its inexorable path.

Makes no difference how fast you go, life will only ever maintain a steady pace.

 

 

Article by Tim Walker

Edited by Speed E Boyce

Photography by Finny S First