Mit Reklaw’s Lentil Soup

Nobody would question it, the affairs of Auckland Super City mayor Len Brown are in disarray.

The question some might be asking: should these affairs even be public knowledge?

A good follow-up query might then be: if they were to become widely known, should those affairs influence public opinion of the man at the centre of said disarray?

Looking at the situation from a quintessentially South Island point of view, one would no doubt claim that given the man’s preeminent position, he should probably try to maintain a manner befitting a Government lackey. Of course this would not include gallivanting with a Chinese hussy young enough to be his daughter.

From the perspective of a North Islander living anywhere but the Super City of Auckland, I’m sure the consensus would be that Mr Brown has a duty to exhibit the integrity, the scruples; to uphold the etiquette expected of a second term mayor. The fact that the aforementioned shenanigans commenced somewhere within his first term, is incidental. The fact that some would consider the terms integrity, scruples, etiquette and mayor utterly contradictory, also incidental.

So what about those millions of people squashed into the metropolis that is Auckland City? Yeah. What about those guys? Funnily enough the very people who should find Len Brown’s escapades the most disconcerting, seem to be the least perturbed. This likely relates to the fact that the majority of Aucklanders are not voters; thus even if they were terribly put out by their great leader’s infidelity, based upon the fine logic that is democracy, their opinions would not count.

Doesn’t quite add up, does it? The whole of New Zealand appear to have an opinion on Len Brown’s recent indiscretion, while those folk living under the man’s flailing command, per capita, have the least to say.

Granted, there have been numerous street polls; displays of general unrest, uproar and other unofficial methods of measuring public feeling, but on that sacred day when ballots are everything, Aucklanders appear much too blasé to stick their necks out.

Then there’s Mrs Brown. She’s an Aucklander. I’m guessing she’s suitably incensed at her husband’s philandering. She probably won’t do anything about it either.

Some might argue: ‘Dude, give him a break, he’s just a man – albeit a pathetic, snivelling, self-deprecating little piss-ant of a man, but a man nonetheless. Men make mistakes. Sometimes those mistakes happen to sample from the Orient…’

Really? Come on. Who would say that?

Fair call, that’s just me.

Ultimately Len Brown is human. Humans are renowned for their ability to make erroneous judgements – people make poor decisions leading to shitty mistakes. I’m not saying that I condone his antics, because I most certainly do not. I am simply saying that Len Brown is a man. He is just another person in the world. Yes, admonish him for his actions, but let’s not go on about it.

Brown is already the colour of excrement.



Article by Mit Reklaw

Edited by Izzy A Sheat

Photography by Hysa Fowler with Ngaire Spect


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