Gosh, how terribly unlike me.
It’s the first day of 2014 and already I’ve managed to antagonise myself.
Agreed, that doesn’t sound at all unlike me. Even so, there are two things about that heading which just don’t sit quite right…
Firstly, I seem to have foregone my pseudonym – removing the mirror so Mit Reklaw reads Tim Walker again. Secondly, and this display of pedantry will prove to any disbelievers that despite the name reversion it is still me and yes I do still teeter on that deranged precipice; secondly it’s the fact that I have yet to encounter any form of Beginning, which is not a New Beginning, thus ‘Tim Walker’s New Beginning’..? Yes, indeed, it is suitably apt; and hence thus so therefore…
Right. I should explain myself. It was really only my desire not to be recognised as an affiliate of Facebook which inspired such an uninspired nom de plume – uninspired in that I could just as easily have referred to myself as Mega Buttload or something cool like that…
Thing is though, my late grandfather and his brother once raced a greyhound they called, Reklaw’s Pride. I learned that piece of history a little over a decade ago. It was the first time I had realised that Walker backwards was Reklaw. Seriously, it rocked my world. Therefore, when I joined Facebook only days before my 30th birthday, Mit Reklaw seemed the logical way for Tim Walker to maintain his furtive presence…
Yeah. Although I obviously didn’t think so at the time I can now appreciate that a middle aged man inverting his name for the purpose of anonymity, does seem pretty juvenile. Also lame.
So that’s my story. As for ‘New Beginnings’, despite my earlier show of deprecation I now see that I was in fact justified in using such a tired idiom: today is the 1st of January 2014, thus a New year is upon us; that heading, the title you will have read at the start, was the Beginning, of this. Also, I am Tim Walker.
Not wishing to take away from the brilliance of my readers, I best let you lot piece that one together.
Additionally, it’s not just the year that’s new. Many things will be beginning today. For instance, a great many resolutions will have been undertaken last night – only to be shattered in the days to come…
That’s where I’m a little different. I made the pledge to relinquish my beloved tar babies way back in November so while everybody else is buckling under the strain of ‘six hours without a cigarette’, I’m already over a month into it – at the risk of sounding a little smug…
Ha.
Alright. That’s me. To all you delightful little word-smiths out there, Merry Cliché and a Hackneyed New Year.
Article by Tim Walker
Edited by Mit Reklaw