I have had just about enough of these idiot rugby fanatics who claim to be able to gauge the All Blacks’ future performance based on a few recent games against decidedly weaker teams.

“Oh, nah, we’re not playin’ good enough, eh,” I have heard, “nah, we shoulda put eighty points on Nam – on Nami – on Nabimia…”

”Oh yeah,” was another, “shit at this rate they’ll get knocked out by ‘stralia in the quarters…”

“Nah man, we’re not as good as last time eh,” was the last opinion I bothered retaining, “last time’s team was so much better than this one…”

Stop it right there. I dispute any drunken rugby speculator who claims to have clear recollection of the last game the All Blacks played, let alone a 2011 Rugby World Cup match…

You’re likely the same bunch of lack-witted numb-skulls who showed such blind adulation for Stephen Donald after he – according to sources – kicked the penalty to secure New Zealand the 2011 Rugby World Cup, seemingly forgetting that up until that moment you had loathed and mocked the abilities of that very same man for, despite winning us the 2011 World Cup final against France, being responsible for losing us the Tri-Nations trophy earlier that same year by, in the dying seconds of the game with New Zealand ahead by just a few points and a deft boot into touch being all that was required to seal the win, kicking the ball straight back to Australia then watching in dismay as they skirted our defences and dotted down to score the winning points.

That’s the Stephen Donald I remember – the very same Stephen Donald who ruined what was to be the All Blacks’ longest ever unbeaten record; heading for 16 consecutive, all we ended up achieving was merely equalling the record total with a relatively mediocre 15…

Sorry, back on track. You mindless idiots are acting just as the media expect you will: they’re feeding you propaganda about how poorly the All Blacks are playing; you’re lapping it up and even reinforcing it with your ‘memories’ of past instances.

Here’s the fact, guys: this is exactly what the media did four years ago, only then it was worse because the tournament was in New Zealand, and in fact this is the very same thing the media do with every world cup in the intention of causing exactly what they have – doubt.

With doubt comes talk, with talk comes ratings.

In reality, any team in any sport struggles to play at their best when their opponent lacks the competency to perform at the level at which the aforementioned side has been practising; in other words, it’s tough to do your best when they’re not playing your game.

It’s a fairly worn-out adage but in this case, I think it does actually hold some truth – a team only ever plays as good as its opposition.

Dude, they’ll do fine.

Article by Tim Walker

Edited by A B Wiry

Photography by Noah Kneed Fwit