Seemingly the globe is warming; evidently this is due to an excess of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere; supposedly this is due to irresponsible and unnecessary polluting…
Realistically, do we think these dick-headed conservationists will ever open their eyes and observe the increasingly high number of living, talking, breathing souls walking the aforementioned cuddly globe?
There it is: the greatest cause of carbon dioxide pollution in the modern world – the expulsion of human breath. The world’s population is larger now than it has ever been. Planet Earth currently contains more living hence breathing creatures than ever before; based on size rather than number, the majority of these living entities are warm blooded.
Question: did you ever file into a freezing school hall on a winter’s morning, disbelieving of the fact that your sadistic teachers were forcing you to subject yourself to such intolerable cold – only to leave around an hour later having removed all of your winter garments?
Answer: the fact that our world is currently warmer than it has ever been and is only forecast to become warmer might very well relate to industrially or commercially manmade pollution but please, let’s not discount the most obvious yet least recognised cause of manmade pollution – our very own bodies.
While most people seem to be aware of, and indeed make a valiant effort to adhere to, the most ‘pollution-friendly’ way to live their lives, all this really achieves is to make room for the millions of litres of expelled gases to be inevitably emitted by the next contribution to our inexorably burgeoning population.
People are warm, people breathe. By no means am I suggesting we should relinquish our worldwide endeavour to reduce pollution levels, not at all; what I am saying is, to the scientists/conservationists/zealots/idiots of the world, for Christ’s sake stop blaming your bloody Global Warming on automobile emissions or industrial pollution or anything else that’s not biological.
It’s us. Accept it.
Article by Tim Walker
Edited by Worm Bludded
Photography by Brie Thur